Dog Property Laws
1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be your in any way.
6. If I'm chewing something up, all the pieces are mine.
7. If it just looks like mine, it's mine.
8. If I saw it first, it's mine.
9. If you are playing with something and you put it down, it automatically becomes mine.
10. If it's broken, it's yours.
Dogs Live Here
If you don't want to be greeted with paws and swinging tails, don't come inside because Dogs live here.
If you don't like the feel of a cold nose or wet tongue, don't come inside because Dogs live here.
If you don't want to step over many scattered toys, don't come inside because Dogs live here.
If you think that a home ought to smell of perfume, don't come inside because Dogs live here.
But if you don't mind all of this....you will be instantly loved when you come inside because Dogs live here.
Puppies
It's not so much the non-stop round of food and clearing up.
It's more the papers (still unread) now shredded in a mound.
It's not so much the constant noise, of laces being chewed.
It's more the holes in all the clothes, that once gave me some poise.
It's not so much that on the stairs, their paws have left a trail.
It's more their tiny toothy marks that now grace all the chairs.
It's not so much the early start, or puddles on the mat.
It's more the folded laundered socks they've just now pulled apart.
It's not so much the time I lose while watching them at play.
It's more the early morning songs and poohs on soles of shoes.
It's not so much the way they race to greet me at the gate.
It's more the wags, and bags and bags of kisses on my face!!!
Just One More Dog
Why own a dog? There's a danger you know,
You can't own just one, for the craving will grow.
There's no doubt they're addictive, wherein lies the danger.
While living with lots, you'll grow poorer and stranger.
One dog is no trouble, and two are so funny.
The third one is easy, the fourth one's a honey.
The fifth one delightful, the sixth one's a breeze,
You find you can live with a houseful with ease.
So how 'bout another? Would you really dare?
They're really quite easy but oh, Lord the hair!
With dogs on the sofa and dogs on the bed,
And crates in the kitchen, it's no bother you've said.
They're really no trouble, their manners are great.
What's just one more dog and just one more crate?
The sofa is hairy, the windows are crusty,
The floor is all footprints, the furniture dusty.
The housekeeping suffers, but what do you care?
Who minds a few noseprints and a little more hair?
So let's keep a puppy, you can always find room,
And a little more time for the dust cloth and broom.
There's hardly a limit to the dogs you can add,
The thought of a cutback sure makes you sad.
Each one is so special, so useful, so funny.
The vet, the food bill grows larger, you owe money.
Your folks never visit, few friends come to stay,
Except other dog folks, who all live the same way.
Your lawn has now died, and your shrubs are dead too,
But your weekends are busy, you're off with your crew.
There's dog food and vitamins, training and shots.
And entries and travel and motels which cost lots.
Is it worth it, you wonder? Are you caught in a trap?
Then that favorite dog comes and climbs in your lap.
His look says you're special and you know that you will
Keep all of the critters in spite of the bill.
Some just for showing and some just to breed.
Some just for loving, they all fill a need.
But winter's a hassle, the dogs hate it too.
But they must have their walks though they're numb and you're blue.
Late evening is awful, you scream and you shout.
At the dogs on the sofa who refuse to go out.
The dogs and the dog shows, the travel, the thrills,
The work and the worry, the pressure, the bills.
The whole thing seems worth it, the dogs are your life.
They're charming and funny and offset the strife.
Your life-style has changed. Things won't be the same.
Yes, those dogs are addictive and so is the dog game!!